Hello peeps! I hope you’re all doing well. If I can borrow you for a few minutes I have some s’plaining to do 🙂
I know I’ve been slacking on my posting lately, and while I’m super sorry(I really, really am. It makes me feel awful)I do have some reasons. Hence my big news.
After lots, and lots, and lots, of loving encouragement from some dear friends, fellow writers, readers, and family I made the huge decision to take the plunge into the mad world of self publishing.
And I do mean MAD. It’s crazy in here! Alice ain’t got nothing on me!
I was the naive little simpleton who thought all I needed to do was make an account, download a few files, attach an image and VOILA! All done.
Pft! I couldn’t have been more wrong. This shit takes a lot of work!
My to-do list seems never-ending right now, and the number of times I’ve nearly quit is embarrassing. Just this morning for example. FU WORDPRESS! Excuse my French, but you seriously have no idea…. Regardless, I’m determined not to give up no matter the computer gremlins, websites monsters, or endless days and nights of editing and revising til my eyes cross. Writing saved me when I thought I couldn’t be saved-when I didn’t want to be. I owe it, and myself, too much to quit.
Starting this venture at this time in my life could very well be a mistake. Believe me the doubts have done their best to bury me. There’s not an hour that goes by that I’m not dragging their weight behind me, or trying to shove them off my shoulders. Real life has been right there cheering them on too. Most of you know it has been kicking my family’s butt as of late. For those of you just joining me, you’ll just have to trust me. The last four months have brought more trials than I ever imagined we could survive. The most recent one seemed like the final straw. The camel’s back was definitely broken. My husband’s business went up in flames, literally. Our bread and butter was nothing but burnt toast.
We couldn’t believe it. After all we had been through, were still going through, we now had to deal with this too. To say we felt beaten would be an understatement. But, a few short days later we realized it was really the light at the end of the tunnel, or the new door we’d be fools not to open. Some in our life think we’ve lost our minds for opening it and walking through, but I know in my heart it’s the right thing.
I’m at peace with it and most importantly my husband is. Since that horrible day four months ago he has been struggling non-stop. Nothing in his life has been the same. The things he used to find joy in and the ones he needed to do on a daily basis to provide for his family were replaced with smothering fears. He was trapped and slowly drowning. I felt helpless, still do most days, but as I’ve watched him these last two weeks since the fire his step is lighter, his smile quicker. The old him is coming back and I don’t want him to disappear again.
So while he starts his new chapter in life, I’ll be starting mine to help him along. I don’t know that publishing my work will be successful. I have no crazy dreams of becoming the next Stephenie Meyer or EL James by any stretch. But if I can do something I love and in turn help keep the burdens on my hubby lighter, you bet your ass I’m gonna try.
I’d love to have you all along with me for the ride. I owe all of you so much! I wouldn’t be here without you. If I hadn’t had the constant support and encouragement from all of you since day one I would’ve given up long ago. It still humbles me beyond belief. You’re amazing and I thank you all from the bottom of my heart!!
I promise, promise, promise that I’m not leaving fanfic. I’ll still be here and have every intention of finishing You Make Me Wanna Die. I have half of the next chapter done. As of now, Our Last Night and Save Me will be the only fics I take down. I will post the epilogue for Save Me once it ever comes to me, it’ll just be a stand alone. Get those pdf’s while you can!
If you’re up for it, follow my new blog, Alexandra Page Writes–wonder where that name came from 😉 my other social media sites which you can find on the blog, and don’t forget to sign up for the newsletter so you don’t miss out on my upcoming news. You guys will be very familiar with what I publish for now, but I hope I’ve given them enough of a touch up that it will make them fresh and new for you.
Thanks a bunch! I’ll be back soon!